How to Find a Church...

# 1...
Pick a circumstance.

• Perhaps you are now an "adult," having completed your education and managed to land a job, realized you have to pay your own bills and don't know anyone except the middle-aged woman in the cubicle next to you.  
• Perhaps you have moved to a new place for a new job, or a spouse's new job. (related somewhat to the above circumstance...)
• Perhaps you have decided that you need something in your life that might provide some meaning outside of Netflix and Hulu...even if it is Hulu +
• Perhaps you have this annoying, persistent, desire to be part of a church community...even though you've tried to resist it for years, after all, no one else is doing it.
• Perhaps not all is good in you life... What now? often drags us kicking and screaming back to our creator...
• Insert "other" circumstance here...

#2

Make an excuse.

• You are now an adult, and Sunday is a great day to rest up from all that working and bill paying.
• You have moved to a new place and don't know anyone to go to church with.
• Church will still be there when you finish all the episodes of The Office.
• You've resisted church thus far...why rush into anything?
• OK...this one is harder...but can church really help if things are bad?  And anyway, no one at church wants to hear about your problems.
• Insert "other" excuse here--come on, be creative...don't just use the excuses everyone else is using.

#3

Visit a church already! Now some real thoughts about maybe, perhaps, probably, actually finding that church you've been considering finding, or considering considering finding....

• Start with what you know...or what you want to explore.  Now's a great chance to explore all those churches that you "wondered" about when you were stuck going with your parents.  If you started in a small church, you might visit a large one.  If you are mainline, perhaps non-denominational, Pentecostal, or Catholic might be fun. Be prepared for "different," especially if you are traveling between denominational structures and not just sizes.  Approach it as you would a visit to another country.  Be curious about the culture, the practice, the experience.  Know you don't have to move there...but you can if you like it.  And remember, you really do actually have to walk through the door of the church to visit it.  It's tough, but no tougher than interviewing for that new job...didn't know them at the beginning either, did ya?!  One more thought about walking through that door.  It's a good time to visit church.  There may be a few rules, but frankly, church attendance is down, so most places are very forgiving and very accepting.  They will be thrilled that you walked through the door, even if you know nothing.  
• Take some time to think about what you loved about church, or what you hated about church, or what you think church might be (good or bad) if you never attended.  What questions do you have?  What might you look for or try to avoid?  For example, I grew up in a tradition that did not allow women to preach.  That, I would avoid.  I would also avoid a church that didn't let women serve in leadership positions...just a personal understanding of who God is...no prejudice between genders in the God I worship.  You can formulate these questions on your lunch hour, or during a boring sermon if your first few visits don't go well.  If you don't know enough about church to ask a question, go anyway.  You'll have questions as soon as you walk through the doors.  
• Do some homework.  Go to denominational websites.  Most have basic explanations of what they believe and why.  All churches, whether they admit it or not, structure their lives together based on their understanding of who God is (theology).  Checking out foundational beliefs and seeing where you resonate may be a place to start.  Checking out foundational beliefs may convince you where you don't want to start.  
• Pray.  I know.  Kinda hard.  Going to church to learn to pray...but need to pray as you are looking for a church...Much like opening a bank account in my current home town.  I had to have a driver's license to open an account.  Had to have a bank account to get a license.  Where do you start?  But pray anyway.  It's simple.  Just say the words aloud (or in your head) before you walk in the door... "God, guide me to the right place with the right purpose.  And bless all the people who are doing their best to worship you in this place today."  Pretty easy...no smiting involved.  And if you have prayed for all the people doing their best to worship, you've prayed for yourself and thus started off on the right foot.  

#4

How to Decide

• It will take some time.  Visit a couple of times, if you still feel out of place, visit somewhere else. When you feel relatively comfortable after a couple visits, go to the next step.
• Get involved in the life and ministry of the congregation.  Worship isn't enough.  It is essential, but not enough.  You also need to meet the people, learn the practices and values of the congregation.  
• Don't be afraid to admit that you don't know everything...or that you don't know anything.  You'd be surprised how many people never get involved in the life of a congregation because they "don't know enough."  The irony is, not being involved because you don't know enough means you will never learn anything.  
• As you learn, ask more questions.  Talk with the church leadership about what makes sense or what doesn't.  Ask why.  If a church doesn't want to answer questions or the answers go against everything that makes sense to you, move on.  Start the process over.  It will take some time.
• Don't assume all churches are the same.  They aren't.  Also don't assume only one church will meet your needs.  God will surprise you with new insights and practices that grow your faith, even when you have had to leave a church you love.  
• Don't ever, ever assume that churches are perfect.  They are composed of human beings, fallible, sinful, human beings.  They try their best; sometimes they do better than other times.  The question becomes not, "Are they perfect?" but "Are they deliberately depending on God, trying to respect each other, loving each other as God loves us, and being faithful followers to the very best of their ability?"  God doesn't call perfect people into God's church.  God is perfectly faithful to God's people.
• Listen to God.  You will have a feeling...a draw...to a congregation.  It may or may not make sense.  One of my daughters was drawn to a congregation with no young adults...when she was a young adult.  Seemed like the logical place would be a congregation with young adults.  But, she joined anyway.  It wasn't a bad experience in any way...just confusing to be drawn to a church that didn't have what you thought you needed.  At the end of her graduate school time, she decided to serve a year as a young adult volunteer in mission.  She had to raise her own funding for the year.  That church had enough money to fund her year.  I don't know another church that could have done that, but apparently God knew where to place her to give her the experience and the resources she need to serve God's purposes.  Be ready to be used by God.  It will happen, even if you've never been a church member before.  

So, there's a start if you want to find a church.  I've probably left out a bunch.  Any other suggestions would be welcome.  But do it...God has a place just for you...and there's a remarkable thought.